Worthy As You Are
I’m thrilled to share that my new book, “Worthy As You Are: Weed Out Unhealthy Beliefs and Nourish Your Authentic Self” is available from Amazon, IndieBound, Barnes and Noble, and Llewellyn Worldwide, its publisher.
“It’s not okay to be you. You are not good enough as you are.”
So many of us have heard this message in some form: not thin enough, pretty enough, smart enough, and so on – not the right gender for this career, or not the right race or sexual orientation for this privileged position.
Sometimes these messages come with an option to “improve” ourselves: buy this product, lose twenty pounds, land that job, etc., and we’ll be worthier. Sometimes there is no inroad to what we’ve been told we should be, which can become a source of shame. I believe these kinds of sentiments are among the root causes of much of the low self-esteem and insecurity we see in today’s world, and what I came to learn – after participating in an intensive spiritual training program in my mid-20’s and studying and practicing holistic health and psychotherapy – is that these messages are not true.
Each of us is fundamentally divine, and because of that, we are worthy, as we are, right now, and we always have been. I came to appreciate that through combining spiritual practice with tools from cognitive behavioral therapy – one of the most popular, well-researched therapeutic modalities today – we can come to know our worthiness for ourselves, and in knowing it, experience profound healing and greater well-being.
That is the heart of what Worthy As You Are is about: integrating practices like heart meditation and affirmations alongside challenging unhealthy thoughts, developing compassionate thinking skills, and strategizing self-care. This all comprises a system that helps us decondition ourselves from harmful beliefs and step into the harmony and contentment of our authentic selves. Selves that are ever divine, regardless of what we were told. The image on the right provides a snapshot of the mental dimension of the system in this book.
There is another aim at the heart of this work. Like many, my healing and spiritual journey has crossed varied terrain. I’ve encountered beliefs that profoundly aided me, alongside others that harmed me, all in the name of spirituality. The latter was generally part of a phenomenon called “spiritual bypassing.” In a nutshell, spiritual bypassing is the use of spirituality to avoid or deny natural aspects of the human experience or the difficulties within our circumstances. For example, believing we should never feel anger or grief, which would go against human nature, or that people are responsible for giving themselves illnesses that run in families with their thoughts, despite what we know from science.
Over the years, I’ve learned to digest the spiritual teachings that resonated with me and filter out the ones I recognized as spiritual bypassing. Sometimes this meant discarding beliefs entirely, and other times embracing them in a less extreme form. As a consequence of that, I hold beliefs and practice in a manner that, I would say, upholds the gold of many popular beliefs that are found in New Thought, holistic health, and self-help material, while amending or discarding the ones that can be harmful – beliefs that have often been criticized for being ableist, ignorant of privilege and oppression, toxically positive, and shaming of people with chronic illnesses. This image is an example of how I have amended one of those beliefs, and this approach appears in multiple places in the book.
What this means is that this is a book about aligning with Spirit – experiencing that we are divine and able to find guidance and creative power by virtue of that – that honors and celebrates our human imperfections. We don’t need to run away from emotions like anger, guilt, or grief, or try to stifle our negative thoughts in the name of some lofty ideal of eternal positivity. Instead, we can practice compassionate thinking, which I provide instructions for in the book, and organically make our way to sustainable holistic well-being through embracing the humanity we were born to experience. We can realize that we are worthy as we are, and when we live from that understanding, the quality of our inner lives profoundly improves.
The system in this book has brought me to a place where I live each day with a sense of connection with Spirit and where my thoughts default to compassion. That doesn’t mean I’m perfectly healed – and I don’t think perfection is what healing is about, like how a wound can heal yet leave scars behind, which holds psychologically too. What it does mean though is that my life is vastly better, and that is why I wrote this book: I know that in between spiritual perfection, which may seem forever out of reach, and spiritual disconnection, there is a vista of constant connection and growth. One that feels like gardening within our lives, and because I know that is real and it has transformed and enriched my life so much, I want to share it with you.
I know some of this may seem very simplistic, and it is. Let it be. Healing does not need to be complicated. There is nothing here to achieve, and there is nothing to prove. We are holy and worthy exactly as we are. Let me show you what helped me realize that within myself so that it may help you do the same.
Praise for Worthy As You Are:
“Psychology and spirituality don’t have to be two separate paths, but can instead act as twin serpents winding up the caduceus of self, offering a truly integrated approach to self-inquiry. In Worthy As You Are, Durgadas embodies, exemplifies, and expands on this, effortlessly incorporating tried and true methods of CBT therapy with spirituality, to truly make a difference in the lives of readers who engage with this sort of inner gardening. Written with compassion, reverence, and honesty, this book is a gift to anyone who wants to transform themselves and their world from the inside out.”―Gabriela Herstik, author of Inner Witch, Bewitching the Elements, and Sacred Sex
“We all want to know that we are deserving of love and every wonderful thing. But we don’t always know how to get there. Luckily, Durgadas Allon Duriel has given us a masterful roadmap. This book is not just a pep talk: it’s a scientific system for getting from where you are to where you want to be. If you’re serious about changing your inner monologue to one that magnetizes blessings, heals you on all levels, and transforms your life in the most positive possible way, don’t just read this book. Read it carefully. Follow its instructions. And do your best to live its wisdom every day. You’ll be amazed.”―Tess Whitehurst, author of The Self-Love Superpower
“Worthy As You Are is a beautiful follow-up to Durgadas Allon Duriel’s masterful The Little Work. Within this book you’ll find practical tools to tend to your inner garden, cultivate compassion, and heal. Weaving Cognitive Behavioral Therapy with affirmations and life stories, you’ll learn how to shift your thinking to an empowered, healthy place. This is a must-have book for anyone who wants to change from the inside out and stand in their true power. No matter where you are right now, you can transform―and this book will show you how.”―Theresa Reed, author of Tarot: No Questions Asked
“Worthy As You Are is one of the best psychology books of our era. Like a compassionate friend, Durgadas reveals his wisdom on the most common topics as well as less-discussed ones such as chronic conditions, gender, and spiritual bypassing. Readers will learn the most current methods to help them heal and thrive.”―Astrea Taylor, author of Intuitive Witchcraft and Air Magic